I WIN

By an overwhelming majority, 100% of my vast male readers agree with me.

I work with alot of guys and a few select females that are more like me, not really all that girly.

That means the reason I love my job is because you don't have to spend your day worrying about some stupid little remark offending anyone.  That also means that you have to "thick skin" and a very crazy sense of humor.

Over the last three years, everyone in the office mostly enjoy their day because they spend it insulting me in every "fashion" possible and they know I will not take offense and I can give as good as I get.

So on Friday, I wore a top similar to the one pictured below:

I never want to have to go back to the days when I had to dress in a business suit, heels and pantyhose.  I wear jeans every day and Fridays are even more considered "casual days".  Maybe it was the clothes, but I used to spend most of my time watching my back because the men and women I worked with would stab you in the back in a heartbeat.

After lunch, it started.  One of the guys looked at my lime green top and said, "My parents had a car about that color." 

I said, "It was a Dodge."  He didn't know.  He's barely 40, but I remember the lime green Dodge that sported the same color I wore.

A few minutes later I was in another guy's office and he also makes a comment about the color of my top.

I have no idea why they attack me in this manner.  I think it might have started with the fact that when any of the guys walk past me wearing a "girly" color I say, "HEY.  Cute TOP." 

You wanna see a guy's spin around like they are Regan from The Exorcist, say that to them when they are wearing Lilac or Coral or Periwinkle.  I would like to take credit for that line, but I actually stole it from a guy I worked with several years ago when we were commenting on another guy's pastel shirt.  It was such a great straight line, I use it whenever I can.

So when the second guy makes a comment about the color of my top, I repeated the first comment.  Told him it was the color of a cool Dodge, back in the '60's.  He disagreed.  Said, "MAYBE, but it would have been a Dodge Dart."  All hell broke loose at that time.  If I had any ounce of "offendability" in my little finger, that comment would have lit it.  A great argument ensued and I was about to google my winning argument.

The second guy then walks into the "big guy's" office.  NO, not THAT Big Guy, the next-door-office-executive who is ALL about cars.  Second Guy says, "Rita, come in here."  Second guy tells Big Guy, "look at her." 

If you think I was in the least bit intimidated at this time, you do not know me. 

I stand there with my hands on my hip and Big Guy hired because he knew no one intimidates me.  Since then he and everyone else have found out no one can offend me either.

Second Guy said, "Was there ever a cool car that color?"  Big Guy would absolutely know the answer to this, but it was a "great guy conspiracy".  Big Guy, said, "NO, never that color." 

Second Guy and Big Guy are a few years older than me and I KNOW they remember the cool Dodge's "back in the day".  I insisted, "Oh yes there was, it was a Dodge."  Big Guy said, "Maybe a Duster."

Are you seriously kidding me?  First accused of being a Dodge Dart and then a Duster?  Oh, it is all out war now. 

I pulled up both the Dodge Challenger and the Charger on google, printed them out on the color printer and posted them outside my cube which both Guys have to walk past on their way to the "manly" restrooms.

I spent nearly all day yesterday on a conference call with these "boys".  In the waning times the lime green top argument was brought back up.  I told them that from now on I was wearing that color every single day.  Political correctness does not exist where I work (for which I am eternally grateful) and one of them says, "or come topless."

I said, "I would, but the funny thing is I am the exact same color underneath."

After the laughter died down, the Big Guy said, "Well, that doesn't surprise me, you ARE alot like the Grinch."

So thx guys.  You have proven that I win the argument.  Lime Green Dodges in the '60's WERE cool cars.